What really offends me is how you treat me. I've never done good in your eyes. Whenever i try to join a conversation, you always have the rudest word to say and embarrass me in front of everyone. You never know when to admit it's your fault because you never admitted anything. Thank God for patience, that even through the years that you've put me down, i have never disrespected you in front of those who love you. It's ok if people would think i am the bad person, the selfish, envious fool. I know the truth. The Man above knows the truth. I am not like you who is kind to her friends, but loves to make fun of me in front of them. I hope that you'd notice whenever you do that, one of them would always come to my rescue. And i know that makes you even more jealous.
When you i see i am blessed you're never happy nor proud of me. You'd always do things, like get angry at me, complain about what i do, or use me for your convenience. Yes, i may be using whatever you are blessed with right now for my convenience, but i try to do my share in order for me to help out. I'd offer you help, you wouldn't accept it, yet there will be times you'd make me feel like i should be eternally grateful for i eat on the palm of your hands.
Please don't ever think i wouldn't wanna help you when you're in need. I have always prayed that you'd be guided and that you'd also receive a miracle just like i did. What holds me back from helping you is you never kept your word whenever you make promises to me. That's why it is hard for me to trust you whenever you promise me something. One hundred percent of the time i lend you something, say money, i don't expect it to be returned. Because i know you never will. You always wanna have what i have. I never competed with you, i have always loved you. Looked up to you. I have idolized you when we were younger, but i can never let you take what is mine. My life and happiness.
Just this afternoon, i wanted to explode in anger with what you said. Your friend asked you about the business and you said we gave it up because of our wedding expenses. It's partly true, but you blew everything off. You asked us to have this business with you and then you just left us hanging saying you don't have the money. And then when we're at the brink of letting the place go, you suddenly wanted to put something up for yourself. I thought you've changed. I guess you haven't. You're just nice to your friends and a show off to our parents for they have never favored you.
I know if you'd read this, you'd say "i am not like that!" and then you'd start to tell me things i would never wanna hear and blame me for everything. That is why i always keep my mouth shut, because i don't wanna get hurt anymore. I love you, but i hope you'd love me too. I hope that you'd be happy of what i am having now. I have no properties, but i have love and i am happier than ever. I just want you to be happy for me.
I love you. Never forget that the same blood flows through our veins. Never forget that i have idolized you once and continued to respect you. I hope you'd save at least a little respect for me. Once i'm gone, i hope you'd remember how much of a help i was to you and your family. How much i've influenced your children to become better persons and how much i've tried my best to instill love and respect to them for each other. May you find love, just like i did. May you find happiness even in the simplest thing or way..
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